Did you ever really want something to happen? You were so excited to do something or go somewhere, see the newest movie, get the newest book, and a million other things that you expect from your already fabulous life?
So what happens when everything doesn’t work out? The event gets cancelled (your friends no longer want to go), your destination is not as exciting as you hoped, the movie and/or book was disappointing overall. Now you feel let down, maybe rejected. Why? What is the reason that you feel these negative emotions? How did you go from one extreme to the other so quickly? You are probably reading this going hey dummy the stuff I wanted fell apart so let me deal with it. Is that what you think you are doing….dealing with it? Nope
What actually happened is that expectation got crushed and went into your mind to curl up and feel sorry for itself. It has infested your happiness and general positivity because it is sad it did not get met. What if it didn’t exist? What if that expectation was never big enough to be let down and take that kind of control over your psyche?
If you stop giving expectation power you will probably enjoy things more rather than being let down. Instead of being sad that your friends don’t want to have game night anymore maybe you should be appreciative they made time for you and want to go out, even if you just wanted to wear sweatpants all night. If it is really that big of a deal to you DO NOT GO! That is always your option, but it would seem a pity you don’t spend time with them just because the plan changed…it would be useless to not enjoy something new whether an experience, book, or movie just because it wasn’t what you were expecting. If you just take everything for what it is and not what you expect it to be, I bet you will find more enjoyment in your activities.
So you have read through this and decided yeah this weird blog person is right! I just want to have fun and be with the people I enjoy being with! So make a change. On nights with friends don’t be passive if they ask you what you want to do, but make your only expectation for the night that you all have fun whatever you do. A new experience maybe your only expectation is that you try something new and gain a new memory or learn something from it. Start framing anything you do whether alone or with others in a way that can only lead to appreciation for that time spent.
Stop letting your expectations build up so high that you can only be let down. It hurts and takes away from anything you might be doing. Nothing is ever going to be exactly perfectly right and the earlier you accept that, the earlier you will be able to live through appreciation rather than expectation.