One after the other. All we do all day as living beings is decide. Some decisions we make unconsciously like breathing and others have been holding up in our brains for far too long like commitments. The latter is usually what causes us the most turmoil. It could be your over commitment to a person, place or even a thing such as a fish, dog, plant. Even those last mentioned commitments may seem like very simple commitments, but you have officially become responsible for the life of something else. If that thing dies….it is your fault, how depressing is that. What if you have poured everything you have into your relationship with your girl/boyfriend or even just a platonic friend and they just *decide* one day that they do not see the relationship having a future. Ouch. Or! You move away to a place that you thought would change your life and increase your happiness exponentially when really you overpay for a tiny apartment and you work so much to pay for that apartment that you never see anyone. As Alanis Morissette would say, ‘Isn’t it ironic?’.
What you have been missing this whole time though is that you have not been making your decisions, you actually have been letting your environment make them for you. Until you change the inside, you will always have the same things reflected on the outside. Live in the box and be overworked, but in the little time you do have decide that you are going to be happy and love the city you moved to. Decide to go out and take a walk to learn your new neighborhood, visit a new bar, join a MeetUp group and meet new friends. Your relationship ended, that sucks but turn it around! Some of the best advice I have ever heard was that if someone wants to walk away that is a good enough reason to let them go. So go ahead and mourn your relationship- I hereby give you permission-but do not live there. Pick yourself right back up and realize how awesome you are and do not look at that person as a loss look at this as a new opportunity to rediscover some of the things you love. Be your own person and march to your own drum there will come a time where someone will add their beat again.
It is time for all of us to learn that we are our own worst eskimos (shout out to all you BMW fans) and until we move out of our own way, no person or place or thing will ever be able to bring us what we crave. So move out of the way people! Step to the side and let the little you inside out to dance and run free. You are not too old or young or committed or tired or poor. If there is a will, there is a way. Do your research, find your way and figure out how to move out of the way. Decide that you are the best work in progress on the planet and keep going from there. Remember that this is all about you so let those haters hate and forget them. At least you tried. You did not hide under your bed like many others in the world just waiting for things to happen to them. You got out there and congratulations, I am proud of you!